Dear Staffers,

So, they want to look into our Military Intillegence...intelligence...Military Information huh?  Well, OK.  We'll give em that.  I would like an unbiased and bi-parisian group of seven individuals who will get to the bottom of this. OR as we say in Texas, "I need someone to hold their cards right so I can see what's up their sleeve."

So, I'm announcing my Committee.  First of all, I'm going to be on it.  Anything independent needs me on it because, as we say in Texas, "I strong willed horse can get away from you if you don't break it."  So that leaves six.

Then of course, there's Dick (Cheney) so if anyone knows where he is, we need to call him.

Then, Colin (Powell) because we need someone in a uniform.  Makes it look more Military.

John Ashcroft has good ideas about how to keep people in the dark so we'll give him a call. 

Carl Rove said he was done with all of his paperwork for this week so he's available.  That makes five.  So, to make it bi-parisian...or Bi-Partyish...we should get Condi on the group.  That makes it Bi..right?

So, to get some star power on the group, I was thinking Arnold Swars...Swartz...uh..the Gov. of California is way too busy.  So, let's contact that kid who played Frodo in the Lord of the whatever movie.  He's good at getting things done.

Yours,

GWB

I'm the president! How y'like THEM apples?