Two men are sitting in an airport when one turns to the other and says, "You know I just had the most embarrassing moment of my life."

"I was waiting in line to buy my ticket and the girl behind the ticket counter had the biggest most beautiful breasts I'd ever seen. Well, I'm waiting in line and I'm staring and waiting and staring. And when I finally get up to the counter instead of asking for two tickets to Pittsburgh, I say I want two pickets to tittsburg."

"God, I was so embarrassed. Anything like that ever happen to you?"

The other guy thinks for a moment, then he looks at him and says "Yeah, as a matter of fact, just this morning I was having breakfast with my wife and I meant to say Honey, please pass the corn flakes but what came out was you fucking cunt you ruined my life."