I am grateful and I know my ghosts are not out to harm me but more so to guide me. They don't want me to be driven by anger or fear but rather nudge me toward a gentle understanding of what I encounter. I think what it boils down to is perhaps a way to reach through the chaos and offer a hand to those that find themselves walled in by it.
I am always trying to gauge if I am seeing something clearly or if I am blinded by some predisposed notion.
When Julia finds me sitting alone in silence staring at nothing she asks me what I am doing and my answer these days tends to be "Communing with my ghosts." because I don't want to say my thoughts out loud to her such that they may scare her. Stuck with that natural instinct to protect those I love as I am. And she will say "What are they telling you?" and I say "That all I need is right in front of me." and I hug her tightly. Then I ask her to remember the waltz we danced at our wedding, to this song:
–-- 'The only way to avoid getting crushed by absurdity, is to humbly include the absurd in our calculations.'
Reg(view)
I am grateful and I know my ghosts are not out to harm me but more so to guide me. They don't want me to be driven by anger or fear but rather nudge me toward a gentle understanding of what I encounter. I think what it boils down to is perhaps a way to reach through the chaos and offer a hand to those that find themselves walled in by it.
I am always trying to gauge if I am seeing something clearly or if I am blinded by some predisposed notion.
When Julia finds me sitting alone in silence staring at nothing she asks me what I am doing and my answer these days tends to be "Communing with my ghosts." because I don't want to say my thoughts out loud to her such that they may scare her. Stuck with that natural instinct to protect those I love as I am. And she will say "What are they telling you?" and I say "That all I need is right in front of me." and I hug her tightly. Then I ask her to remember the waltz we danced at our wedding, to this song:
–-- 'The only way to avoid getting crushed by absurdity, is to humbly include the absurd in our calculations.'
