Kathryn:

I had a similar situation, only mine involved DIVORCE and not adoption. Between my birth and sixteenth birthday, my father had come to be married five different times.

My sister Lisa was born in 1967 and I did not see her since she was one year old --- I next met up with her when she was an adult and had two children of her own. She was 24 when I next saw her.

My brother Michael was born in 1968, and I did not see him between the ages of 10 and 25. I met up with him again, because he had just happened to wander into the same place as where I was working at the time. This was just before his wedding to his fiance Cindy, and I was very happy to have been able to go to that wedding.

However --- not seeing someone for that many years, is just too much water under the bridge. Today, I have neither my brother or sister in my life --- the reunions did not work out as well as they did in my fantasies I had about them over the years.

For instance, I was extremely upset to see the mental condition of Mike's mom (my dad's # 3 wife) --- and whom I still consider to be the mom of my heart. She was absolutely shell shocked --- it was super depressing to see.

Also --- relatives that I was close to 15 years ago --- had long moved on, and upon our reunion --- did not hold me in as high esteem as I wanted them too --- that hurt quite a bit.

I'm glad that things worked out for you --- ultimately I am glad that my wife got to see and hear the other side of the story of my life --- it was just pretty fucking shitty that my past ended up staying in the past, and couldn't join me in the here and now.

Oh well . . .

Peace and Prayers,

Kent Daniel Bentkowski Buffalo, New York USA